Remembering Bob

Bob Poerschke
 (Taken at Audrey and Nick's wedding)

November 4, 1918--December 3, 2010

I'm thinking of Daddy and missing him especially as the anniversary of his death approaches.  I'm grateful for his 92 years and for all the wonderful memories that remain. 

Winning the Battle of the Bulge

For the most part, I've been pleased with how my Retirement Project is progressing.  My attempt to sift through all of the excess baggage and get down to the basics has been paying off.  Most of the drawers and closets in our house are much less cluttered now, and have taken on a definite order about them. Bill commented the other day that he could not believe how nice it was to have the extra space and to find things in their places instead of having to rummage through piles of unrelated items to find a screw driver or a roll of tape or a flashlight. 

The rental space with Daddy's things still looms large; but, even that seems like a manageable task, since I made contact with Suzette, at Shred It, who assures me that all I have to do is call her by Friday and she'll have the truck come to the door of the storage unit on any given Tuesday.   The "shred monster" will destroy about a box a minute, paper clips and all.  It will even eat small three ring binders. 

I've checked the timeline for my Retirement Project action plan and find that I am right on track with all of my goals.  Aside from all of the cleaning and organizing, I'm continuing to blog on a regular basis, have completed a set of poems about my grand children, and am making good progress on a memoir of my grandmother that I've been working on for some time now.  I've also started attending a Sunday School class, and am trying to re-establish relationships at church.

I was beginning to feel  as proud of my progress as a first grader who just got a smiley face or a gold star from the teacher for my work.  And then, as I was becoming all smug and righteous about my accomplishments, I ran smack dab into that old brick wall I've been running into for years--my own personal baggage, my weight.   Regardless of what I do, I seem to reach a plateau above my ideal weight and then gain and lose the same 2-3 pounds over and over.  My "Battle of the Bulge" has been ongoing for as long as I can remember.  I've managed to win a number of skirmishes, but have never succeeded in permanently winning the war. 

When  I  stepped on the scale recently, after several days of redoubling my efforts to exercise more and eat less, I was once again confronted with the dreaded 2 pound gain instead of the 3 pound loss I'd hoped for.  It could easily have been temporary water gain or my body trying to adjust to the new regimen; but, I did not persevere long enough to prove or disprove either theory.  Instead, I allowed the soggy weight of defeat to submerge my resolve and dampen my mood. I made a quick trip to the stash of Halloween candy I was "only keeping around for the grandchildren" and helped myself to the rest of the miniature Twix bars. 

Regret and self-reproach followed the "mini" candy binge as I bid goodbye to the prospect of getting back into my "skinny wardrobe" any time soon.  I continued my pity party throughout the weekend to the point that Bill asked me several times if there was anything wrong.  I said I just didn't feel very well, and I actually was fighting a pretty bad chest cold.  But the truth is, it was all about the yo-yo weight gain.  Had the scale given me the news I wanted, I would have been energized and motivated, and ready to move the world.  As it was, I felt heavy and dull and unattractive; and, it was all over 2 little pounds.  There is simply nothing that drags me down like gaining weight.  So, why in the world do I go on fighting the battle of the bulge?  Why can't I figure out a way to win the war and be done with it?

By  Monday, I had finished wallowing in my self-pity and was ready to pick myself up and begin again.  I did the only thing I knew to do: make a new plan and try to follow it.  I considered trying something drastic like resolving to lose 5 pounds quick by going on that dreadful cabbage soup diet for a week. And then I remembered that the last time I did that,  I got sick of it by the third day and ended up with no pounds lost and a gallon of cabbage soup in the refrigerator.  Besides, all the  diet research I've ever read clearly shows that successful weight loss results from life long changes in eating rather than a sprint to drop a few pounds just to gain them back. 

They say that people don't perform up to expectation for two basic reasons:  either they can't do it because they lack the skills or knowledge, or they won't do it because they lack the motivation or will.  I can't plead guilty to lack of knowledge in failing to  meet my expected weight loss goals.  I have spent so many hours reading books and articles on diet and nutrition, in hopes of finding a quick fix to my weight problem, that I could have gotten a degree in it. No, my failure to lose weight is not because I can't do it.  It is obviously because I won't do it.  Motivation or will, then, is what stands in the way.

I decided to begin again by starting with the basics and building my new weight loss plan on proven principles of diet and nutrition. I made a list of Diet Do's and committed to the short term goal of losing at least 10 pounds, reducing my waist size to 34 inches, and getting my BMI down below 27. 

Diet Do's
1. DO keep a food diary of everything I eat
2. DO use a pedometer to track my exercise and walk at least 1200 steps per day.
3. DO reduce my food intake by at least 200 calories per day.
4. DO eliminate sugar
5. DO eat lots of lean protein
6. DO eat 2 servings of fruit per day
7. DO eat at least 3 servings of vegetables a day
8. DO eat small meals
9. DO have planned snacks
10.DO drink plenty of water

I found a site similar to the Weight Watcher's web site, only it's free, where you can track weight, record food intake, track exercise, and get support in the form of recipes and diet suggestions. There is also the option of posting progress on Facebook and signing up with a buddy. The address is http://www.everydayhealth.com . I'll be using that to track my progress. Not so sure about the buddy and the posting on Facebook yet, but maybe I'll decide to do that later. 

I was ready to begin my new lifestyle change when my chest cold got worse and I started feeling absolutely awful.  I ended up going to the doctor for an antibiotic and remained under the weather for several days.  Needless to say, that delayed my plans, as I am not one of those lucky ones to lose weight when I'm sick.   Instead,  I tend to seek comfort food, which is usually heavy on dairy fat and empty carbs.  My recovery took me into Thanksgiving weekend, which as anyone knows, is not the ideal time to start a new diet regimen. 

Monday, November 28 is now the official date for starting the plan that will ultimately lead to the end of a yo-yo dieting syndrome and a slimmer and healthier me.  This time, I plan to win the battle of the bulge for good.   I'll keep you posed on how things work out.

Grandchildren

Charlotte, Henry, Will, Mattie, Andy, and Jack

Wrightsville Beach, Summer 2011

It’s hard to believe that there could be any creature more amazing than your own child.  You live with that certainty for years, and then one day a grandchild comes along and deepens  your understanding of what “amazing” really is.   Your very own child is your heart. The child of your very own child is the heart of your heart.  Watching him or her is watching your child again for the first time. What you see is so familiar and similar and yet so unique and new.  The baby is like a prism, through which myriad family traits refract and bend and reveal themselves- grandpa’s chin, mama’s eyes, daddy’s furrowed brow, sister’s fair complexion, brother’s temper.  The light shifts; the view is altered; the baby grows and changes and amazes. 

These little rhymes reflect a tiny spec of what I see in the prisms that are my grandchildren, viewed through the eyes of a grandmother.   Each continues to grow and change and yet each remains child of my child, heart of my heart. 

CHARLOTTE RAE When Charlotte Rae comes out to play She wears a smile that spreads a mile Across her face. Charlotte Rae with eyes of blue And hair bow just a bit askew Will melt your heart When she grins at you. Charlotte has a button nose And likes to wiggle all her toes. She thinks it is a special treat To kick her socks right off her feet. Charlotte’s patient, Charlotte’s kind But she will surely speak her mind If Henry hugs a bit too tight Or she wakes up hungry in the night. Charlotte Rae is one big flirt She bats her eyes and swishes her skirt, And causes all the little boys To turn their heads and drop their toys. Charlotte Rae will have some fun But she’ll let you know when she is done. After all, She’s almost one. JOHN WILSON John Wilson, or Jack, as he is known Can talk to you like he is grown. He’ll point his finger and explain In terms so clear and words so plain. With his dark brown eyes and furrowed brow I forget for the moment, I don’t know how, That in spite of the way he speaks to me This little boy is only three. Jack likes to help and he’ll work hard At daddy’s side to mow the yard. He shops with mother at the store And likes to do most any chore. He plays with his toys around the house And watches Handy Manny and Mickey Mouse. He hangs out with little brother Andy And he loves Skittles and M and M candy. Here’s a secret you should know: Jack likes his serious side to show; But, if you tickle him he’ll giggle, Laugh out loud, and start to wiggle. That is when I’ll steal my hug From this little cuddle bug. WILLIAM TODD, JR. Will Stillerman will soon turn 4; He’s not a baby anymore. He’s learned his letters and his numbers too, And he can count anything out for you. Will is strong and he is fast! Watch him speed as he runs past All the other kids of three, And four, and five and six…and me! Will lights up whenever you play Any song by Roger Day. He’ll sing out loud that “It’s a no-no For anyone to kiss a Rhino.” Will ‘s  a good sport and likes to play. He’s happy to do things Mattie’s way; But if his heart is just not in it, He’ll tell you “No” in a Texas minute.  Will is sweet and he is shy. He’ll duck his head and cock his eye. When he peers through tousled bangs at me, I hug him tight and wish he’d stay three.

ANDERSON THOMAS Anderson who just turned one Can crawl as fast as I can run. His honey curls and eyes so bright Will make you want to squeeze him tight; But, you had better hold him fast And get some kisses while they last, Before he’s off across the floor To find more places to explore. Andy is a man of action In his bare feet he gets traction. Up to lofty heights he goes Which keeps his mother on her toes. Andy’s busy as can be. He has no time to humor me; But, I will steal a little hug As he speeds by me on the rug. Andy’s calm and sweet and fair, With rosy cheeks and curly hair. Come on in and take a peep, Little Andy is asleep. HENRY KENDRICK Henry Kendrick could win a prize With his long thick lashes and his big blue eyes. He’s three years old and smart as can be, And he always has a hug for me. Henry’s learned his songs and stories by heart. He can tell them to you from finish to start. One’s a Halloween tale with moans and groans, And a refrain to “ shake, shake, shake them bones!” School is a place that Henry enjoys. He likes to play with the girls and boys. Amanda is his best “gril” friend And he’s faithful to her to the end. But he’s glad to come home at the end of the day, To Momma and Daddy and Charlotte Rae. And when dinner is over and stories are read, He’ll cuddle up with Teddy and go to bed. Henry is tender and he is kind And even when he forgets to mind All you have to do is ask And he will get right back on task. MATTIE KATHERINE Mattie Katherine has it made. She’s just tuned seven and is in first grade. She’s good at soccer and choir and ballet And does her homework every day. She loves her teacher and her friends at school And tries to follow every rule. She is learning to count and read and write And studies about Egypt and the stars in the night. Mattie’s heart is made of gold. She cares about others who are hungry and cold. She walks for hunger and does all she can To help the world and her fellow (wo)man. Mattie knows how to act and dress Like one of Disney’s Princesses. She likes Snow White and Rapunzel and Belle But her all-time favorite is Ariel. Mattie has green eyes that twinkle and glow And a smile so warm it could melt the snow. She’s growing up, that’s plain to see But she’ll always have a hug for her E-Dad and me.

Making Progess

A while back, I developed an action plan to help me stay on track with my Retirement Project. One of the steps in the plan was to tear out the overhead cabinets and the vanity in our tiny master bath to make it look more spacious, and to update the sink and commode and towel racks, and give the walls a fresh coat of paint.  I also planned for a narrow cabinet in the corner to the right of the window, with with a clothes hamper in the bottom, to fit neatly behind the door in a space that would otherwise be wasted.

Another step was to add a front porch to the house to dress it up a bit and give us a place to sit and enjoy the yard that Bill works so hard to keep green.  It took the builders about two weeks to complete the project and I was very pleased with the result. 



To keep track of how my Retirement Project is progressing, I'm highlighting in green the steps that have been completed and in yellow the steps that I have begun but are still a work in progress.  At this point, I'm pleased with the progress I've made so far and am optimistic about meeting all of my goals. 

Retirement Project—Action Plan

In Progress

Completed

Action	Timeline	Progress Notes
House Cleaning, Organizing and Renovation	August 1, 2011—July 31, 2012	Finished  It’s all Too Much by Peter Walsh to guide project and The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin
Master Bedroom Deep clean and organize Paint walls and trim Pull up carpets and finish hard wood Replace shades Replace bedding Update pictures Replace rugs Clean and organize closets	Finish by January 2012
Master Bathroom Pull out shelves Replace vanity and toilet Replace towel racks Install shelf over toilet Install linen cabinet and clothes hamper Replace shades Paint walls and trim and ceiling Replace towels Replace trash can, soap dish, toilet brush Update pictures Deep Clean	Finish by October 15 DONE 10/18
Guest  Room—Taupe Deep clean Organize closets and give away clothes and clutter Update pictures Head board for bed	Finish by  November 1
Guest Room—Yellow Deep Clean Organize—Bill Get closet organizers for sweaters and shoes Change curtains and rug	Finish by January 2012
Hallway Paint walls and trim Hang family picture gallery Replace rugs with runner	Finish by February 2012
Kitchen Deep clean and organize	Finish by November 1
Sunroom Buy and install new computer Organize work desk and files Clean windows	Finish by November 1
Porch Clean and winterize—refrig inside Recover chairs  Replace rug Treat/paint wood	Finish by May 1, 2012
Living Room Deep clean and organize Replace pillows Hang picture over chest Get rid of coat tree Re-arrange pictures Organize coat closet Organize pictures and memorabilia in chests Clean out table linen drawers	Finish by January 2012
Sitting Room Deep clean and organize Replace cabinet nobs Replace rug—put old one under coffee table in LR More lighting	Finish by November 2012
Dining Room Deep clean and organize Get linens ready for holiday Polish silver Clean and organize cedar closet Clean and organize china cabinet Look for new dining room set	Finish by November 1
Laundry Room Deep clean and organize Sort clothes and give away	Finish by November 1
Play Room Deep clean and organize Give away old toys Clean closet and give away old things Fix door	Finish by November 1
Basement living room and Kitchen Deep clean and organize Clean closet and organize	Finish by December 1
Basement Bedroom Deep clean and organize	Finish by February 2012
Basement Bathroom Clean shower	Finish by November 1
Colonial Storage Unit Shred all boxes of documents Go through boxes of personal things and distribute/throw away Distribute/give away furniture Bring yellow chest home to store towels Pay last bill!	Finish by February 1, 2012
Exterior Clean windows Build Porch Porch furniture
Garage Deep clean and organize	Finish by spring 2012
Front Yard Even up boxwood Potted plants on and around porch Fix lamp post Replace House Numbers	Finish by spring 2012
Back Yard Close pool Build raised gardens next to garage New Pool furniture for next year Call Mosquito Authority	Finish by May 2012

Action	Timeline	Progress Notes
Vocational Growth
Research opportunities for starting small business—service oriented, related to hunger, housing, home services, etc.	Ongoing to July 2012	Googled process for starting LLC and talked with Todd about it
Research Dream Law and opportunities for working with undocumented immigrants	Ongoing to July 2012	Finished  A Home on the Field by Paul Cuadros; keeping up with news on Dream Law
Research writing and publishing of kids’ books, fiction, non-fiction.	Ongoing	Googled about writing and publishing kids’ books
Research opportunities for part time work in education—common core curriculum, evaluations	Ongoing to February 2012	Am keeping up with DPI website
Personal Growth
Travel	Ongoing	Trip to London and Edinburgh, August 4-15
Expand Technology Skills Update Computer Learn to sync music, pictures, calendar, e-mail Learn mail merge Learn how to manage contacts Organize files Create Blog Post regularly on Blog Use Facebook Purchase Smart Phone Use Text feature Learn to check e-mail Learn all features and use Buy Kindle and begin using Expand use of Kindle	Ongoing
Learn Spanish Online Spanish Course	Consider for second semester
Take Creative Writing Class Check offerings at Wake and Salem  and Forsyth Tech Read and write daily	Consider for second semester	Books I’ve Read TR Trilogy by Edmund Morris Paris Wife (about Hemingway) The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway Fall of Giants by Ken Follett The Winter Ghosts by Kate Mosse A Home on the Field by Paul Cuadros Elizabeth I by Margaret George She Walks in Beauty by Caroline Kennedy Richard III by William Shakespeare The Greater Journey by David McCullough Re-read I am One of You Forever Blogging every day—posting regularly Attended book talk by Fred Chappell
Remain current on Common Core curriculum and Teacher Eval. Instrument Read DPI website regularly Read Weekly Forum e-mail	Ongoing
Spiritual Growth
Discover how the institutional church is/is not relevant to my life. Attend worship at Peace Haven Talk to Roger Underwood about Knollwood Get involved in a Sunday School class Seek a community of faith that provides spiritual nurture, inclusive fellowship, and an outlet for authentic service.  Decide about future church attendance Identify a place or places of service in the church and/or in the community that will utilize my own unique talents to make my community and the world a better place.  Check out ministries in WS related to feeding the hungry and working with homeless Check out opportunities to relating to immigration reform Reflect upon, identify, organize, and articulate my personal belief system Read the Bible systematically Review Baptist history	Ongoing Ongoing to March 2012 Begin at least one volunteer day by January 2012 Ongoing	Finished A Time to Live by Robert Raines Pilgrim’s Progress, By A Dream Possessed, a history of Myers Park Baptist The Book of Exodus Am reading History of Baptists by  Torbet  Reading the Pentateuch